Badjokes.exe (Warning this Thread is not for the faint of heart (Or easily offended)

[DC Chroma]

Is it just me or is this forums in need of a thread for spamming bad jokes?
I THINK IT DOES! Ahem, I'll start it off: (I think I'm going to hell for this )

1. Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he doesn't have the guts to do it.
2. I tried to think of bird puns, but they always fly over my head.
3. What do you call a grape that complains? A wine.
4. I tried to think of period jokes... It was a bloody mess.
5. What do you call a skeleton who isn't dating anybody? A shin-gle!
6. Why do vampires believe in everything they hear? Because they are suckers!
7. Two satellites decides to get married. The wedding wasn't much but the reception was incredible!
8. What do you call a guy with no shins? Toe-knee
9. What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
10. What does a clock do when when it's hungry? It goes back four seconds.
11. A man walked into a bar with a piece of asphalt. The man says "One beer please, and one for the road!"
12. Why did the picture goes to jail? Because he was framed!
13. What did Barack said to Michelle when he got down on one knee? I don't want to be Obama-self!
14. I'm really starting to hate these stupid little Russian Dolls. They're so full of themselves.
15. Who invented the round table? Sir Cumference.
16. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
17. Where does Frosty keeps his cash? In the snow bank!
18. I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them but I've been trippin' all day.
19. What do you do when you see a spaceman? You park it in, man!
20. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh!

 

[Drax]

Never give a donation to someone collecting for a charity marathon.

They will just take the money and run.

 

[AgentPiman]

What do you get when you cross a thief with salsa? dip

 

[DC Chroma]

Well, call me an exorcist, cause that's the spirit!

 

[Wanka]

The jokes here are of the same calibre as the Jokes for Minecrafters book.

 

[DC Chroma]

The jokes here are of the same calibre as the Jokes for Minecrafters book.

Buddy, you do see the name of the thread, right?

 

[Wanka]

it was just joke my ma'am
please go on with your day and don't hurt me please

 

[DC Chroma]

it was just joke my ma'am
please go on with your day and don't hurt me please

Ma'am? I'll have you know that I'm a dog, woof.

 

[Console]

The jokes here are of the same calibre as the Jokes for Minecrafters book.

beautiful Finger

 

[𝐆𝐑𝐗𝐃]

I'd tell you guys a chemistry joke, but I don't think I'd get a reaction.

 

[AgentPiman]

I'd tell you guys a chemistry joke, but I don't think I'd get a reaction.

K

 

[trash can the bad samurai]

Ya see, I only tell bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones ARGON. Wow, I really need to ZINC of more chemistry puns, as I only tell them PERIODICALLY. But, they don't get much of a REACTION.

 

[AgentPiman]

could this be the boiling point for these jokes???

 

[DC Chroma]

K

How about we team up? We'll both be great alloys. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

[Loldielol]

Off-topic, you forgot the ) at the end ._.

 

[DC Chroma]

That's the joke. But if it's to keep yours and other's sanity then I guess I'll edit it. On second thought... Nah I'll keep it.

 

[Loldielol]

That's the joke. But if it's to keep yours and other's sanity then I guess I'll edit it. On second thought... Nah I'll keep it.

I could edit it for my sanity, but I am not like that

 

[DC Chroma]

I could edit it for my sanity, but I am not like that

If you do edit it, you'll start the first ever edit wars.

 

[Loldielol]

If you do edit it, you'll start the first ever edit wars.

Now that's new lol

 

[DC Chroma]

Now that's new lol

Indeed, now I would try to make an egg joke here, but I don't think I'll crack a reaction.